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? my life...... @ Thursday, January 28, 2010 ?

Sorry didnt post to my blog, for a very loooooooooooong time. Everytime i want to post, sure there's error on this blog.. haih.. x de jodoh..
And plus, everytime i want to post a blog, sure have to write a title but i dont know wat to write and that's why, the title x de kena mengena dgn cerita aku nih..
So, lets get started! get ready hands, go!!! type type type~~~

My new semester had started. And i realized that this is my last semester and insyaallah this september, i;m going to fly to cal poly US. I feel excited but at the same time nervous. But i cant be so excited, nnti takut x jadi. Selalu jd cam2..

This semester, I mmg berazam untuk mengaktifkan diri dlm club activities.. X nk dah jd passive jer. Anyway, takut if g US nnti, bler kena interview or something, haa~ apa kamu ada masuk club? org putih kan, mmg jenis suka budak yg aktif and outgoing and plus excellent in studies too.., sbb tu diaorg maju kot. haha...

These days, I had realized something. Sometimes, I want to be alone.. Bukannya, kera sumbang ke apa, tp enthla, i feel not feeling well about my feelings and my heart. Sakit... Bukannya luka luaran yg boleh diubati tau, ni luka yg susah nk diubati.. mmg x de ubat utk luka ni... ada tu ada, tp mmg susah....
(cries alone..... dah la tgh dgr lagu sedey,.... huhu.. T.T)

Oh yeah, actually the law of attraction really works on people.. If u think positive, then the things will go positive.. If u think negatively, then it will go bad.. Make this as an example, well, there's one morning i woke up, and mmg masa tu x de mimpi yg buruk berlaku.. usually i had dreams at night and it gets me tired all the time. So, that morning, I woke up happily.. lalala. and my head, i mean, i didnt think anything,.. Its just a calm and peace mind.. kosong..... and yeah, how's my day? Well, mmg ok la.... I just feel biasa and happy... lalalala~~ .. So then, I told myself that buangkan sikap sakit hati, dan dengki sbb tu boleh merosakkan diri kita secara x langsung.. Throw all the negative thoughts, and it will be fine. Maybe sometimes, u cannot throw away those feelings but force urself...
U know what, even though sometimes i got problem and hurt in the inside, i just smile.. I forced myself.. I dont know why... I dont want people around me worried or the atmosphere become bad.... So, i just smile and the smile sometimes, can make my heart feel really hurts...... cause its not a real smile.....
But that depends also.... sometimes i want to be alone....

Ok, enough of the sad talks!! HAHAHA! be happy la!!
I was wondering, if i'm going to US, omg! I will missing malaysia food a lot! Especially rice and masak2 yg lain! nasi lemak, roti canai, kuey teow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2 years, man!!!!! sakit gler x leh makan makanan semua tu! dah la, the country that i go US, and most of the food x halal especially the meat.. huhuhu...
And plus, lately, this semester, I feel really home sick.. Kalau boleh tiap2 minggu i nk balik rumah. actually, i x pernah pn rasa homesick sejak i masuk college.. Probably, after this, i'm going to US for 2 years i didnt see my family.... Jumpa kat skype jer.. HAHA...

Sometimes, I feel scared la go US, cause i dont know whether i can live there or not.. I x pernah g merantau negara org laen sbnarnya.. So, this will be my first time. :))

Lastly, i want to say that:

I LOVE ALL MY FRIENDS. THANKS FOR BEING MY FRIEND. I REALLY APPRECIATE U ALL CAUSE U ALL ARE ALWAYS BY MY SIDE....

THANK YOU...... :)




My story ends here!